BACK UNFRUITF 4'2m0f The parable of the unfruitful tree ED -- And now, sit down, put your feet up, relax and listen to another edition of... Parables on Parade. Tonight's parable comes from Luke chapter 13 beginning at verse 6. Then he told this parable: "A man had a fig tree, planted in his vineyard, and he went to look for fruit on it, but did not find any. So he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, 'For three years now I've been coming to look for fruit on this fig tree and haven't found any. Cut it down! Why should it use up the soil?' "'Sir ,' the man replied, 'leave it alone for one more year, and I'll dig around it and fertilize it. If it bears fruit next year, fine! If not, then cut it down.'" FRED -- The man OBVIOUSLY knows nothing about horticulture. ED -- And I suppose you do? FRED -- Pfff. That goes without saying. ED -- But, I suppose you'll say it, anyway. FRED -- Exactly. Now, I knew that sooner or later you'd be getting around to the parable of the unfruitful tree. So, I have been preparing for this event for weeks. First, I have prepared a slide show. Lights Please! ED -- You realize, of course... FRED -- Lights, PLEASE. ED -- Alright. (click) FRED -- (click, click) This first slide shows a miserable, emaciated fig tree the day I acquired it. ED -- That's not a fig tree FRED -- See, there you go again, getting picky. ED -- But, it's not even a tree. It's a broad-leafed plant. FRED -- Picky, picky, picky. ED -- What kind of plant is that, anyway? I've never seen a plant like that. FRED -- But we digress. ED -- My mother had one of every plant imaginable and she never had one that looked like that. Where did you get it? FRED -- I found it in a dumpster outside the United States Customs office. But we digress. ED -- This plant might have been confiscated when someone tried to illegally import it. FRED -- Or maybe it was a plant in someone's corner office. Who cares!? ED -- There's a reason it was in the dumpster, are you sure... FRED -- But we digress! We have a slide show going on here, remember? (click, click) This next slide shows the amazing recovery of the plant after only two weeks in my care. Notice the rich green color has returned. (click, click) This next slide shows the plant one month after I rescued it from certain destruction. Notice that at this stage the plant is as tall as me. ED -- Doesn't it strike you as odd that a plant grows average of one foot per week? FRED -- Yes, indeed! It is a Testament to my skill, care and nurture of this once wretched plant. (click, click) And now turn the lights on. I will show you, up close and personal, what a plant looks like after only five weeks in the hands of a true horticulturist. (door opens) (afar) Bring it in fellas. Set it right there. Thanks, guys. That'll be all. (door close) (near) Well, what do you think? ED -- It's grown another two feet in one week! FRED -- I knew you'd be impressed. ED -- And look at the size of the flowers on that thing, you could put your head inside there! FRED -- Did I do good or what?! ED -- Are you sure this thing is not dangerous? FRED -- Well, I can't deny that it must LOOK a little intimidating. My dog and cat ran away from home last week. ED -- Are you sure they ran away. FRED -- They must not have liked the way the plant was just taking over my apartment. The cat disappear almost a week ago, the dog disappeared a couple days later. ED -- Oh, oh. Well, if you don't mind, I'll just step outside the studio to do the sign-off. (open door) FRED -- Where are you going? I want to show you how the flowers seem to follow you around the room. Ed -- Later, maybe. (close door) Tune in next time for another edition of... FRED -- (afar) Aaaaaaaaaaah! ED -- Parables on Parade. (open door, afar) What's the matter? What happened? Where'd he go? Hello?! ©2001 Bob Snook. Conditions for use: Do not sell any part of this script, even if you rewrite it. Pay no royalties, even if you make money from performances. You may reproduce and distribute this script freely, but all copies must contain this copyright statement. http://www.fea.net/bobsnook email: bobsnook@fea.net BACK |