BACK HELL 4'?m2f Heaven and Hell: So close, yet so far AMY -- (enters wearing work clothes, carrying bucket, with rag over shoulder, surveys stage, smiles, dusts off podium or other furniture with a swat of the rag) LIZ -- (enters wearing coat, with head down, removes coat, hears the swat, gasps) What are you doing in my house?! AMY -- Oh, I'm sorry, I was hoping to finish before you got home. LIZ -- Finish what?! Robbing me blind?! AMY -- Oh, I'm sorry. How rude of me. I should have introduced myself. I'm your new neighbor... (extends hand) LIZ -- (ignores Amy, notices something pleasant about the surroundings) ...Wait a minute. Something's different here. It's brighter in here. AMY -- It's amazing what a coat of paint will do. LIZ -- You painted my house?! AMY -- If the color is too light, I can come back and paint it a darker shade... LIZ -- ...and the carpet. It's thicker. It's like walking on air. AMY -- I replaced the carpet. LIZ -- You what?! AMY -- But I didn't change the color when I upgraded it. LIZ -- You upgraded my carpet?! It's brand new! AMY -- I found a perfect color match in the premium grade. I upgraded the padding too... LIZ -- (points to ceiling over audience) ...Why does my chandelier look so much brighter? It didn't even sparkle that much when it was new. AMY -- I replaced the cut glass with diamonds. LIZ -- Diamonds!? AMY -- If the light is too bright for you, I replaced the (points to audience side wall) on-off switch with a dimmer switch. You can... LIZ -- ...You put diamonds in my chandelier!? AMY -- The diamond market is way down. I got them for a steal.... LIZ -- (points to audience back wall) ...What did you do to my back yard?! AMY -- Oh. Ah, I thought a privacy fence would make it a little more cozy.... LIZ -- ...No, I'm talking about the pool! You put a swimming pool in my back yard?! AMY -- Listen, if you think the waterfall is too gaudy, I can bring the crew back and have it removed... LIZ -- ...Wait a minute! I know what you're up to! This is a scam! AMY -- A scam? LIZ -- Yes, a scam! You can't fool me! I'm not signing any contracts... AMY -- ...Contracts? I... LIZ -- ...You know, you can't make me pay for things I didn't order! The law is on my side! So, you can just forget it! AMY -- Oh! No. No. I don't expect you to pay for any of this. I was just being neighborly. LIZ -- Neighborly?! AMY -- Yes, I was about to introduce myself, when you... (offers hand) LIZ -- (ignores Amy, turns) ...You mean, this is mine? All mine? And it won't cost me anything?! AMY -- Not a thing. It's a house-warming gift. LIZ -- A house-warming gift?! This is paradise! (pause) Oh. Oh, no. AMY -- What's the matter? LIZ -- On my way home tonight... I walked across the street and a big truck came at me with it's brakes screeching... AMY -- Yes, it did. LIZ -- But it didn't stop in time, did it? AMY -- No, it didn't. LIZ -- So, I'm... I'm dead. AMY -- Yes, you are. LIZ -- So, this IS paradise. AMY -- Yes, it is. LIZ -- And I get to live in paradise! AMY -- Well, not exactly. LIZ -- Not exactly. AMY -- No. (guides Liz to far exit) I had a construction crew install a big picture window here on the side of your house, so you can look in. You'll be living on the other side. LIZ -- The other side?! It's dark on the other side. Why would I want to live in the dark? AMY -- I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want to live in the dark. LIZ -- I... I don't understand. AMY -- Well, let me put it this way. This (points back to center stage) is where you would have lived if you had made a commitment to Jesus. But... LIZ -- Oh, no. Then, it's true what they said! AMY -- Yes. You'll be on the outside looking in. LIZ -- But it's dark out there! AMY -- Well, look at the bright side, you'll be able to see what you're missing. (exiting with Liz) LIZ -- (exiting) Is it my imagination? Or is it getting hot? ©2007 Bob Snook. Conditions for use: Do not sell any part of this script, even if you rewrite it. Pay no royalties, even if you make money from performances. You may reproduce and distribute this script freely, but all copies must contain this copyright statement. http://www.fea.net/bobsnook email: bobsnook@fea.net BACK |